A Few Important Reminders for Expectant/New Moms

It's always interesting going to Bump Club's Expectant Mom Dinner Series now that I myself am a mom. I see things from a totally different perspective now that I have a little one at home. But at the same time, without fail, I learn something new every time.

Our dinner this month was all about adapting to the emotional changes that come along with having a baby---the transition to becoming a parent, your relationship with your significant other, and most important, understanding the signs and differences between the baby blues and post-partum depression. The topic of this dinner was a little "heavier" than most, but something that is incredibly important, and rarely talked about.

A few things that I wanted to share and reiterate to expectant moms/brand new moms are:

1) Take care of yourself. This may seem like common sense, or maybe it seems purely insane now that you are also responsible for someone else. But if you are not taking care of yourself it is hard to take care of your baby. Dr. Sorkin talked a lot about trying to make sure you are sleeping (as much as possible), eating, and exercising. This was a good reminder as I think it's easy to forget sometimes when you have a newborn. No one expects you to be super woman---you just had a baby and certainly can't do it all!

I remember back to when Baby J was first born. Although it was only 9 months ago, I was in a completely different place. Things are hectic when you first come home from the hospital. You get into a what seems like endless routine of feeding, changing and sleeping (the baby, not you.) It's easy to forget to grab something for breakfast or a snack. Make sure you are keeping easy to eat food in your house so you can grab it and go.

When it comes to exercise---you can't do it until your doc tells you to, but if you can squeeze in a walk with or without your baby, it is great to get out of the house.

And in terms of sleep---we all know that new moms are a tired bunch. But try to nap when you can. It's easy to get used to doing things for yourself (showering?) or your house (the dishes?) while the baby sleeps. Keep in mind that a little cat nap here and there goes a long way. You also can get creative. Let your significant other bond with the baby after they get home from work, and go lay down for a few minutes to give yourself a rest.

2) Make time for your partner/significant other. It is going to seem in the beginning that you may never go out to dinner just the two of you again, but I promise, YOU WILL! Make sure that you are taking the time to do nice things for each other. They don't have to be over the top, just little gestures like asking how your day was, etc. This is especially true when either one of you goes back to work and is coming home for the first time---you or your significant other may feel like they missed out on something with the baby that day.

Also, take advantage of any help you can get from grandparents, siblings, aunts uncles, or friends. The baby is going to sleep a lot in the beginning. If the baby falls asleep and you have someone over at your house, ask them if they mind hanging out while you and your significant other walk to Starbucks, or go grab a an ice cream cone on the corner.

3) Try to get out of the house/Talk to other new moms. If you don't have access to mom events or groups like Bump Club and Beyond, try to find some new mom events or classes in your town. I started taking Baby J to "playgroup" when she was 3 weeks old. Trust me, playgroup wasn't for her---she slept the whole time. It was for me to get out, have something to do, and be around other new moms. We shared stories, strategies, and helped each other out with our babies while we ate lunch.

I also started taking a music class with J when she was 8 weeks old. I used to joke that this was my most expensive nap (she often slept through the whole thing.) But again, the class helped me to meet other moms and eventually J started waking up and truly LOVED the music. Once she was able to recognize it, she even smiled at certain songs.

4) Take people up on their offers to help. It's ok, I promise. Anyone loves to hold a baby. If they are offering, take them up on it. No one expects you to go at this alone. As Janeen Hayward said at our dinner, it really does take a village.

I formed Bump Club and Beyond when I was pregnant and looking to connect with other moms and moms-to-be. Part of why we are here is to offer support and resources while you are pregnant. Please make sure to ask us if you need anything and look on our website for further resources. If we are forgetting anything, or you need something specific, let us know and we will find it :)

I recently have felt like I find myself saying a lot: It's get's easier, I promise. And it does. Being a new mom is hard work. No one said it was easy. No one expects you to have all the answers. And no one expects you to be superwoman. Use the resources available to you, and if you need help, or advice, don't be afraid to ask for it. The first little bit goes by so fast, my best advice to you would be to try to enjoy it. While you are in it, it seems like forever, it can be hard. But six months down the road you are going to look back and won't believe how fast the time has gone.

Simply 'Classic' Photography

As many of you know, I am a HUGE proponent for taking pictures and preserving memories. One of the bonuses of being a new mom is that pictures have opened up a whole new world for giving gifts to my parents (now grandparents), in-laws, and even my husband. A recent photo shoot that Baby J had at Classic Kids Photography in Lincoln Park produced gifts for everyone. I was so in love with the photographs, I couldn't choose! These pictures are unique---they are only taken in black and white photography at the studio.

Baby J and I had so much fun with Lisa and her team as they snapped away at us. I say "snapped" because Classic Kids is one of the only photography studios in the city that still takes pictures using film. The resulting photographs can be described simply in one word: CLASSIC. The black and white images are incredible and their team knows just how to get your baby smiling and looking in the right direction.

My experience at Classic Kids didn't stop with the photo shoot. After my session we set up a time to come in and look at the proofs. I was surprised by how much fun I had, and how holding an image in your hand and playing around with the photographs on the table was so much fun. (Don't get me wrong, I love being able to use the computer to get rid of my wrinkles, but there was something amazing about holding the pictures and going through them.)

Sarah from Classic Kids helped me to combine the images into montages and groups that would compliment each other once framed. She made the process simple and easy---and I cannot WAIT to see the outcome.

Classic Kids pictures are different from any other that I have had taken of Baby J. They are truly special and perfect for that special occasion or milestone that you are looking to preserve. The only problem was that I easily could have bought all of the images had Lisa and Sarah not reigned me in! (I'm sure my husband will thank you for that later!)

Flying the Friendly Skies---again

I felt it only appropriate and necessary actually, to take to my blog after my flight experience earlier this week. As many of you know, the first time I flew solo with Baby J (which was also our last time on a plane), did not turn out so well. I ended up drenched in 12 oz. of baby vomit, only to freeze when I deplaned in Detroit over Memorial Day weekend.

The reason for this update is simple: REDEMPTION ON OUR FRIENDLY SKIES.

Most people couldn't believe that I was willing to fly solo with Baby J again so soon. But after the 4th of July holiday weekend we packed up and boarded another plane to head back to see family in D-town for the week. I did things a little differently this time. Let's just say I've learned a few lessons:

1-Since I don't fly for work anymore I decided to forgo my loyalty to my AAdvantage number. Let's face it, I won't be maintaining status next year anyways, I may as well fly an airline with more family friendly rules and passengers. In my past life as a business traveler I would cringe at the open seating policy on Southwest, but in my new life as a mom, it worked perfectly. J and I actually got two seats (since the plane was not full), close to the front, thanks to the loudmouth passenger who decided to broadcast to the whole plane not once, but twice that I had a baby with me. I get it---she didn't want to sit next to me. Guess what? GOOD! I got a free empty seat.

2. I didn't overfeed this time. Baby J got a bottle on the way up and was entertained with Baby Mum Mums (her snack of choice) throughout the entire flight. I kept breaking off tiny pieces and it kept her occupied the entire time. I doubt the people around me found it amusing as she squealed (make that screamed) with delight, but guess what? I didn't really care. I traded my cushy (sometimes business class) seat on AA for a different A, an A39 boarding position. For 40 minutes, the people around me could listen to a laughing baby. At least she wasn't crying, right? I figured that it could have been much worse. On the descent I gave her some Plum Organic Just Pears which she sucked down, and kept her ears from popping.

3. I took the advice of Hollie Schultz, my friend and owner of The Baby Gizmo Company. At our recent travel event Hollie gave the suggestion to pack in two bags: 1-An over the shoulder purse-like bag/weekender and 2-some kind of backpack. I'll be completely honest, I hadn't used a backpack since I went to summer camp, but managed to find one and put it to good use. I put all of my stuff (laptop, wallet, contacts, extra clothes, etc.) in my shoulder bag and placed it in the overhead bin. I packed J's stuff in the backpack and slid it under the seat in front of me. This arrangement worked PERFECTLY and I had everything at my fingertips. Oh, and I checked our suitcase for no fee as bags fly FREE on Southwest---a perk that will come in handy once my AA status runs out in December.

My one regret---bringing my carrier, I didn't need it. Southwest let's you take the stroller right up to the door of the plane. The B-Agile folds with one hand, and I left it to gate check. Another bonus to flying Southwest---you can still take any stroller with you. Granted, mine is under 17 lbs., but on AA you can't take anything over 20 lbs. anymore as a GATE CHECK. This means no doubles---so for all of you planning to fly with twins, I suggest you getting a Rapid Rewards number!

Overall, the trip was a success. I have somewhat redeemed myself and feel confident that I CAN still travel, even alone, with a baby. I will get back to you with a full report after we take the second leg of our round-trip later this week. Hopefully this post did not jinx my travel luck :)

Food glorious food!

I waited until Baby J was more than ready for food to start solids. I actually waited until I attended Bump Club and Beyond's first Baby Food Making class in April. J was 6 months and 3 days old. I needed help and wasn't afraid to admit it.

I also openly admitted in front of all five classes during the series that I likely was not going to make my own baby food---even though we were having a Baby Food Making Class Series. I figured that if I didn't cook dinner for my husband and I, how was I going to find time to make J a series of purees?

To mu surprise, I found the classes inspiring. I attended all five in the last series and learned something new every time. From the correct order of introduction for their digestive tract, to what to introduce at what age, to great ideas for when J is older that we can enjoy as a family---the classes were incredibly eye opening. Guess who is now making her own baby food? ME! (sometimes...)

I have found it very easy to throw bananas, roasted sweet potatoes (with the peel off), avocado, or steamed carrots in the Cuisinart Food Processor or Beaba Babycook and make a big batch of food for J. I spoon it into ice trays or my Innobaby storage containers and put it in the freezer for later use. When I use the ice trays, I let it freeze, and then pop it out and put the cubes in big freezer bags. The Innobaby containers provide enough food for two meals, which is great for when I forget to take food out of the freezer. I like knowing what is in the food that is going into J's mouth---no additives, no preservatives.

I am not a full convert though---trust me, I, like many of you, don't always have the time to make Baby J her food. I also am very forgetful and often forget to take out the cubes to let them thaw so we can use them for lunch or dinner. But this is the reason why we use store-bought baby food too! Here are some great new(er) products that we have found conducive to our busy, on-the-go lifestyle.

NurturMe: I just discovered this awesome product. The product comes in what looks like a "powdered" form, but it is actually naturally grown and quick dried, in order to maintain more nutritional value. They come in light weight, palm-sized pouches. That are SO easy to throw right into your diaper bag or purse. All you have to do is add water, formula or breastmilk and the dried food turns into a consistency that is perfect for baby. Since I could not transport my frozen baby food to Michigan last weekend, this was a great alternative and PERFECT for restaurants when we went out as a family. PLUS, NurturMe makes the only peas Baby J will put into her mouth.

Square One Organics: If you can't make your own baby food, this is one of the next best things. Square One Organics is found in the frozen food section and is basically a store-bought version of what I make for J at home. Owner, Denise Henderson, started this company when her twins were diagnosed with allergies nearly ten years ago. She is a HUGE proponent for making your own food (Denise helped design the curriculum for our Baby Food Making Series at Whole Foods Market). The best part about this line is that it is based off of a "super food" philosophy. Most of the foods carried in the line are not those that I would make on my own, so it is great to be able to introduce them to Baby J. Included are papaya, mango, and pumpkin---which also can be seasonal in certain parts of the country.

Plum Organics: After taking Baby J through the airport on my own last week, this product is a MUST for any mom's diaper bag. There are no bowls, and really you don't even need a spoon. (However our friends at Boon Inc. make a great dispensable spoon for this product.) Being that I am always on the go, this ready made food is perfect for eating anywhere---particularly when you are in a place that may not afford you the luxury of a high chair or utensils. J sucked the food down in under 10 minutes and licked her lips with delight when she was done. These packets come in a wide variety of flavors. Their line extends beyond the food pouches and also into a great variety for tots including blends, puffs, finger foods, and more.

Bottom line, feeding your baby doesn't have to be a chore. There are so many incredible products out there now, it actually is a ton of fun. Even if you don't have the time to consistently make baby food, I highly recommend giving it a try once. I know that my food processor had not seen the light of day until I took it out for J. So at the very least, I found a new use for it. :)

After selling out in April, Bump Club and Beyond's Baby Food Making Series presented by Whole Foods will be back in July and October of this year. Stay tuned to BumpClubandBeyond.com for more information.

The adventures of flying solo...

NOTE: I honestly think that the written word cannot do justice to the story I am about to share in this post.

As many of you know, I am a huge proponent for traveling with your baby and kids. Bump Club and Beyond is even doing an entire event surrounding this topic at the end of June. Baby J has been on two trips prior to today, but today was the day I took the plunge and embarked on a solo flight with her to Detroit.

A 45-minute flight couldn't be that bad, right?

Navigating the airport was a little harder than when I flew with my husband. There was no one to watch our bags when I took J to change her, and there was no one to watch J so I could go to the bathroom. I used both the stroller and our carrier as I knew I would have to be handsfree to fold the stroller. Overall, we did alright, I would say we get an A+ for keeping everything together and getting on the plane with all of our gear in tow and properly stowed.

J got a little fidgety before we took off, but she was hungry. I waited to feed her until we were taking off so she would have less pressure in her ears. After her bottle she fell fast asleep in my arms and I even closed my eyes for a few minutes. Upon descent we were put into a "holding pattern" and circled for what seemed like an eternity. The pressure was getting to J and she started to cry. We were going up and down, air traffic control could not make up their mind if they wanted us to land or not. The tears persisted.

I really didn't care much about the crying---I just felt bad for J as I know how awful it is when your ears hurt. I was also trying to avoid feeding her again so soon (remember, this is only a 45 minute flight,) but I figured half a bottle would be fine. But then we were put back into a holding pattern and J started crying again, so I let her finish the bottle.

When I finally thought we were landing, again, another holding pattern. I took out a bottle that had water in it and let J drink some of it. All was going well until J had a little burp. The the burp turned into a belch which turned into projectile spit up ALL OVER me, her and the seat. This was all followed by a second burp and another HUGE surge of projectile spit up. It was similar to the scene in "Parenthood" when Steve Martin gets vomited all over by his daughter.

The woman next to me and I sat there in disbelief. She immediately asked if she could do anything. I immediately asked if the projectile spit up got on her. (Thankfully she was a nurse.) I was sitting in a huge puddle and my jeans were covered in spit up, not to mention sopping wet. J cried for a second and then smiled and started to laugh. In the moment of it happening I wanted to crawl under the chair as I was mortified. But in the end, I used my burp clothes to clean it up, threw everything in my bag when the plane pulled into the gate and got off the plane, shoes squeaking and all. I told the flight attendant and she said she would clean the seat, and then walked through the airport looking like I had peed in my pants.

J and I went to the bathroom and I changed her clothes and diaper. And that was that. We rolled with the punches and made it through our first solo travel adventure (barely, but we made it.)

My biggest takeaways from this adventure:

1-Don't overfeed the baby on the plane.

2-Bring a change of clothes for the baby and for you in your carry on.

3-Roll with it---you can't change a situation like this, so you may as well laugh at it.

Safe travels to you and your family this holiday weekend!

I hope that this post doesn't jinx my good fortune...

Everyone tells me how lucky I am that Baby J is a good sleeper. I don't know otherwise, but I trust them and feel very fortunate. Hopefully blogging about this doesn't reverse my good fortune. ;)

While I know that some of it has to do with her temperament, and the fact that she must have been born with my sleep genes (neither my dad nor I can say no to a good nap no matter what time of day...), a lot of it has to do with the steps my husband and I have put into place to give her a safe and healthy sleeping environment. When Janeen Hayward of Swellbeing, and Deree Kobets and Meredith Legenos of Grow spoke at Bump Club's Expectant Mom Dinner tonight, it was a good refresher of all of the things we have done within our control to get to where we are today.

1. Make sure to have a nice firm mattress for your baby to sleep on. If you can get an organic mattress, even better.

2. Try to make the baby's room as dark as possible. We purchased temporary blackout shades on Amazon.com. Baby J's room is dark all day long---for her naps and at night. However during the first 8-12 weeks of her life, we let her nap anywhere. Most of the time, she napped in our living room during the day. But now, the dark room definitely helps to signify that it is time to go to sleep.

3. We use a white noise machine. We have the Sounds for Silence by The First Years, which we bought at Target. Since we transferred her from the Pack N' Play in our bedroom to the crib in hers when she turned 8 weeks old, we have used the white noise every night. I now need white noise to sleep as it puts me into a restful slumber through the monitor (it's either that or the fact that I am simply exhausted!)

4. SWADDLE SWADDLE SWADDLE! For the first six weeks we thought that J "hated" the swaddle. As it turns out, we were not making it tight enough and she was busting out of it. That was when we enlisted the straight jacket of all swaddle blankets: Summer Infant's SwaddleMe (also described here on our blog.) J slept more soundly once we started to really wrap her up in this. While I can't promise anything, she started sleeping much longer stretches once she couldn't wake herself up at night. As it turned out, she didn't hate being swaddled after all.

5. Make sure the temperature is right in the room. We keep our upstairs at 68-69 degrees F.

6. Make sure your baby is wearing clothes that allow their bodies to breathe. Organic cotton is best, especially if it is next to your baby's skin. Synthetic materials can make them hot. We now dress J in cotton or organic cotton one piece pajamas and put her in a sleep sack. Our favorite is the Aden + Anais muslin Classic Sleeping Bag. It seems thin, but has two layers and really keeps the baby quite comfortable. If you want more warmth, you can always use the Aden + Anais muslin Cozy Sleeping Bag.

7. Once she was 12 weeks old we started a routine. Generally speaking between 7-7:30 (depending on the day's nap schedule) we take a bath (sometimes a quick one), change into our pj's, and have a bottle in our glider before going into the crib. Sometimes we change things up a bit. If J doesn't seem tired, we lay on her rug and listen to music for a few songs until she starts to rub her eyes.

8. Try not to put a mobile that makes noise or a ton of movement over the bed as this can be distracting. Instead, put it over the changing table as that is a place where you can use a distraction for the baby.

9. We have kept Baby J's bed free of everything. She has a mattress, mattress cover, and a sheet which all sits on top of the bedskirt. There is no bumper, no stuffed animals, no blankets, NOTHING else inside the crib. These are the guidelines recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics.

10. You won't know your baby's sleep needs or schedule (which they likely won't have until they are 4 months+) until after they are out of the womb. So take it one day at a time. When you first bring them home, give them what they need. These are my favorite words of Janeen's. Your baby is only that tiny for so long---there is no such thing as spoiling a 2-week old baby! Just enjoy your time with them!

I can't promise that your baby is going to be sleeping through the night at three months if you follow these guidelines. Some things are just out of your control. But I will say that Janeen Hayward has been sharing these ideas with me now for over a year, and using any of them or a combination thereof, can only help you to get you to the place you want to be with your baby's sleep. Make sure to sign up for both Swellbeing and Grow's e-newseletter so that you an get the latest tips for sleep and information on the best products to help you achieve results!

Star struck...

Almost 15 years ago (in what almost seems like another life) I was the Editor-In-Chief of my high school news magazine. Writing was my passion and without a doubt I knew I wanted to pursue journalism as a career. As we all know, things change, and long story short, I ended working on the business side of magazines for nearly a decade before starting Bump Club and Beyond.

Even though I wasn't writing, magazines and the printed word remained my passion. Having the unopened box of magazines fresh from the printer delivered to my desk before they hit newsstand never lost its luster. "What's your point?" I am sure you are asking....

To me, the Editors of the magazines that I read are celebrities. I spend a lot of time with them and their publications every month. Over the years I have looked to the Editors of many of my favorite publications as good friends---they do give me good advice, right? So when Peg Moline, Editor-In-Chief of FitPregnancy walked into our Buyer's Guide event last Thursday night, I admittedly was star struck--and I told her so. I have read every word in every issue of hers since I found out I was pregnant over fifteen months ago. Not only was I meeting her, but she was speaking at OUR event AND I had the honor of introducing her.

Peg lived up and exceeded every expectation that I had about her. She is personable, honest and funny. I now know why I love FitPregnancy as much as I do---Peg's philosophy is one I try to capture at all of our events: WHATEVER WORKS BEST FOR YOU. I think those words came out of her mouth at least five times on Thursday night. In the few moments I spent with her, I know that she means them.

Peg told me that she loved the event and had so much fun. I've already asked her to come back, and next time we will make it even bigger than last week! For the 100 or so of you that were lucky enough to see, meet, and interact with Peg last week---I truly hope that you felt the same way I did. For those of you who were not able to attend---I highly recommend picking up the latest issue of the magazine so that you can see for yourself. I promise, you won't be disappointed. Happy reading :)

Back to Basics During the Blizzard of 2011

Don't get me wrong, I love all of Baby J's "things" that soothe her and keep her warm, dry, calm, and happy. At any given time we have many options to keep her stimulated and entertained: the mamaRoo, The Skip Hop play mat, toys from Tiny Love, Baby Einstein and Lamaze, and as many of you know, I couldn't live without my Little Lamb Swing from Fisher-Price. But the Blizzard of 2011 has given me new perspective to the meaning of "Going Back to the Basics."

When the storm hit I was home alone with Baby J and our dog. My husband was on a weeklong business trip. Great timing I know. We were hunkered down on Tuesday night and with a flicker of the lights we lost our power.

Thankfully I had made a few preparations: gathered some warm clothes, made a few bottles, and took out a flashlight. But I couldn't help but panic. I knew that the house was going to get cold---it was only 11pm. I wondered how long the power would be out and when we would be able to get out of the house. I figured I could bundle J and put her in the bed with me; but then I would have to stay up all night to make sure she was kept safe. For the first time in a long time I was very scared.

My cell phone wasn't working, but BBM was. I had a couple friends trying to figure out what I should do. I thought quick and got a hold of my friend who lives very close and has a Pathfinder. Without a second thought her husband jumped in the car and came evacuate all three of us to warmth and safety.

Before he came it was dark and I couldn't see very much---so I threw J's basic necessities in a bag: diapers, wipes, diaper cream, the bottles, formula, and a few changes of clothes. I grabbed my breast pump and piled it into the bassinet from her Stokke Xplory which I figured she could sleep in. It sounds like a lot, but given what is in the usual arsenal, this was nothing. With some quick thinking I remembered all of my frozen breast milk in the freezer and grabbed that too. I sure as hell was not going to let all of that hard work go down the drain (literally) because of some snow!

We weren't even gone for 24 hours before the power came back on and we were able to get the Pathfinder out of the garage to return home. J was a little out of her element--instead of the lamb swing we laid on a blanket on the floor or I held her; instead of her crib we napped in the bassinet which was a little too small for her long legs, and instead of music from the ipod, I sang her some songs (which probably made her cringe).

It all made me realize that while all of the "things" are great----we all definitely have a tendency to over prepare, over stimulate and over purchase for our babies. Going back to the basics was a great exercise. Maybe now when I leave the house I won't take everything but the kitchen sink? (Really, who am I kidding?) If anything, this all made for a great story for J when she is big enough to understand.

And the best part of the story? J basically jumped out of my arms into her Little Lamb when we got home; and of course I was thrilled to put my feet up and watch her for a few quiet moments.

Pumping woes...

A lot of you have been asking me to blog more often about my experiences as a new mom. I have to preface this post by saying, I am not writing this post to offend anyone. As many of you know already, I am a firm believer in the fact that everyone is different and what works for you may not work for me and what works for me may not work for you. I am aware that this post my elicit some comments or discussion, but I have to get this off my chest...figuratively that is since I literally just finished pumping. As many of you can likely guess, I am referring to breast pumping.


A few years ago I never, ever would have imagined breastfeeding my child, let alone doing it for as long as I have---I am now going on four months. As I have mentioned before, Baby J has gotten formula since she came out of the womb and still gets 1-2 bottles a day from our friends at Enfamil. I know that I am doing a good thing here but boy is it hard. Everyone talks about how hard it is in the beginning to get the baby to latch and on a feeding schedule, etc. No one talks about how it is still hard a few months down the road when your life revolves around pumping or feeding or both. I still think it's hard. And I am sharing my thoughts to let anyone else who has them know---you are not alone.

Who knows, maybe I am flying solo on this one?

I am now an exclusive pumper as it has become a much more efficient practice for me (again, everyone is different...what works for me may not work for you and that is OK.) After four months I will still say, breastfeeding (or pumping in my case) is STILL HARD.

I am just starting to feel for the most part back to normal. My old clothes are starting to fit, I feel good (ok that is an exaggeration, I feel better than last month) when I get dressed in the morning. I have fully recovered from labor and delivery and can walk up and down my stairs the same way I did a year ago. I would say ALMOST everything is normal again---everything that is except for the fact that I have to stop what I am doing 4-5 times a day, put on my Simple Wishes hands-free pumping bra, and pump a bottle for Baby J. All this pumping is making me feel a little bit like an animal. I have to plan my day around when to pump and admittedly and maybe selfishly, sometimes I find it annoying.

When I was back at my old office for a few weeks (before making BCB my full time gig) I had to lug my pump on the el to go downtown and then pump in a conference room (where I once found people eating), and then put my milk in the communal fridge. One time I forgot my milk and got halfway to the el before I realized and had to turn back around to go retrieve it. This was annoying and I am sure my feelings about pumping would be even more down in the dumps if I were still functioning that way. A friend of mine on the other hand visits the Four Seasons of Lactation Rooms every day at her company. They provide private space, lockers, mirrors for when you have to get re-dressed, hospital grade pumps and even little Lucite frames to put pictures of your baby in. And oh yeah---she has access to a lactation consultant too! For those of you out there who have access to this kind of support you are VERY LUCKY!


I know I am very fortunate in that I am still producing milk. Since I am, I am going to keep pumping it out for my baby girl. I don't know how long I am going to keep going, but I wanted to share my sentiments with all of you in case you feel the same way. If there is anything I can guarantee, it is that you are not alone. I promise.

Looking back on the first few weeks...

For those of you who were able to attend our first Expectant Mom Dinner of 2011 with our Resident Lactation Expert, Kathy Lipke, RN, BSN, IBCLC, I am sure you can attest how reassuring she is about the whole birthing/bringing your baby home/breastfeeding experience.

The first time I heard Kathy speak was last June, when I myself was five months pregnant. Part of the reason I love Kathy so much is her willingness to support new moms in what they hope to achieve, and not judge them for what she believes is right or wrong. This is why I have chosen her as our expert when it comes to lactation and why I share her with you. What I found interesting listening to Kathy again last week, having now had my baby, was really how much truth there is to the perspective she shares with us at our dinners and seminars she attends. I couldn't believe how many times I smiled to myself during her talk, or nodded my head in agreement. For those of you who were not able to attend (and for even those who were there), I wanted to share with you some of Kathy's key mantras and how they have worked for me throughout the birthing/bringing baby home/breastfeeding process.

1. BE FLEXIBLE: This is a key point that Kathy always stresses and I could not agree with more. Flexibility is key to your sanity throughout this process. You can certainly choose and think you know the way that you want things to go, but in reality, they may or may not work out that way---and that's alright. Many of you remember me being five days late with Baby J--trust me when I say, that certainly was not planned :)

During Kathy's talk she discussed trying to bring your baby to breast or at least skin to skin when he or she arrives. But take it from one who knows---that can't always happen, and I promise, if it doesn't, it will be ok.

When Baby J was born she had ingested meconium (basically her poop) during the birthing process. When the doctors realized this would be the case after asking me about my water breaking (from its color), they prepared me for what would happen when J arrived. When she came out, she didn't move nor did she cry. Had I not been made aware of the situation prior, I would have been very scared. My labor and delivery room went from having four medical professionals to forty in less than sixty seconds in order to handle the situation.

With J on the Giraffe Infant warmer across the room from me, it seemed like an eternity before she actually cried. When she did finally cry, the head of the pediatric team came over to me and cautiously asked me what I wanted to do about feeding her. Since I had gestational diabetes, J needed to be fed almost immediately. I knew that I was going to try to breastfeed, however at the moment I was a little tied up with my own doctors to be able to do so. I told the team to do whatever was best for the baby---and at that time, she needed to be fed. It would be a good 30-45 minutes before I was able to feed her, so my husband gave her her first meal--a bottle of formula. When I finally did get to go skin to skin with her, it was the most amazing moment of my life. And then, a few hours later, I breastfed her and have successfully been giving her breastmilk (both from nursing and pumping) and formula from a bottle, since the moment she came out.

It may not be for everyone, but for me, it works well that way.

The point of me sharing this information is that when J was born, I was in a situation that demanded flexibility. Not only could I not breastfeed her at the time, but I couldn't go skin to skin either. Things may not have ideally happened the way I wanted them to, but I made sure to make the choices necessary to eventually turn them around and get them to where I wanted them to be. Some things are out of your control, which is why flexibility is key.

2. IT'S OK TO ASK FOR HELP: No one ever said that you had to do this on you own. If you are lucky enough to have family close by, take them up on their offers to come help out with the baby, the dog, the house, whatever. One of the things that Kathy says which I always laugh at is that no one can come over without making you a meal or putting in a load of laundry. She means it when she warns to limit your visitors. It's innate for most of us to play host when people come over, and it is not necessarily the best thing to do as you try to recover.

When your baby arrives, you are tired. Your labor and delivery were probably exhausting, and now that you are home, it's likely you are not getting much sleep. Don't worry about cleaning your house, or offering your guests food and drinks when they stop by. Go about doing what you need to do for you and your baby---let your guests help you in any way that they offer, and don't hesitate to ask.

When Baby J was less than two weeks old, my husband had to go on a business trip. So I called in the reinforcements: I asked my mom to come in from Detroit to help me with the baby. There was no way I could do it on my own, and I would never admit to thinking, or even trying to think that I could. Any help is greatly appreciated and you will be glad when and if you ask for it.

3. DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU: When it's all said and done, no one can tell you how or what to do when it comes to you and your baby. Everyone does things different and only you know what will work best in your situation. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

As you all know by now, I abide by almost all of Kathy's mantras and suggestions. However I too have done some things my own way throughout the course of Baby J's three months. One example: I sent her to the nursery both nights I was in the hospital.

I only slept for a couple hours the night before my water broke. So basically after J arrived, I had been up for almost two straight days. I was exhausted. After I got to my room, and breastfed her, I myself ate a chicken sandwich from the Prentice cafeteria at 1am and nearly passed out asleep while eating it. My OBGYN said it was ok: send her to the nursery.

While I know it is not the choice for everyone---and even Kathy suggests to have the baby in your room---for me, it was the best thing I did. I fell into what was probably the deepest sleep I had experienced in over nine months. A coma-like state...lasting almost seven hours...the longest I had gone without having to pee in a very long time.

And guess what? I did it again the second night, and it felt great.

One nurse claimed "not to be judging me" (she actually said that), but that sending J to the nursery would inhibit my ability to breastfeed her. Thankfully my OBGYN, who I adore, gave me a talking to about that one. They gave J formula in the nursery at night (because I was ok with that), but I nursed her during the day. For me, after sending J to the nursery, and sleeping for 6-7 hours two nights in a row, I felt rested. I know my body and I need sleep or I get crazy. I truly believe that the choice I made helped me to recover faster---and put me in a better place for when I came home and REALLY wasn't able to get any sleep.

The long story short: you can have a plan, and you can think things will go a certain way---but the best plan to have is one that is flexible. Things happen, they change, and you may have to adjust how you do things.

I share this with you so that you know there is no "right" or "only" way to do things. The things that experts like Kathy share---they are suggestions.

Good ones---I can promise you that. But know that even I don't follow all of them.

Ultimately, you know what's best.

Follow your gut.

When needed---call in the reinforcements. Whether it be a lactation consultant to help get your breastfeeding underway; a walker to walk your dog; or your mom to hold the crying baby so you can shower, run to Starbucks, or if you're lucky---get a manicure.

This journey is an amazing one, and one that as Kathy says, will have some "bumps" along the way. Just keep that in mind as you navigate your first few weeks at home. For some of you, it may be tough at first. For others, it may be easier. I can promise you one thing---it's crazy the one day when you wake up and things just truly click.

More on that soon...but for now, I have a sleeping baby, so it's time to close my eyes too. Good night :)